Finding my Independence In Cork Ireland

The weeks leading up to Ireland I was second guessing myself a lot. I found myself thinking Do I actually want to go abroad a second time??? and of course I had people in my ear saying I could never leave during my senior year!. It's not that I wasn't excited to fly over to Ireland or to be able to spend another four months living in Europe, I think that for me this was the first time I really did something like this fully alone- and that is a scary thing.

When I went to Greece a year ago, I flew over with my college roommate, which made the move a lot less scary. At ACG I also was given a community of study abroad students, where friends were practically handed to me on a silver platter through organized events and orientations. This time around I was going over without any close friends and I was working a 9-5.

To be 100% transparent, the first week was really hard. I spent a lot of time sitting back and thinking okay what now? I became so used to having my loved ones within close reach that I felt like i lost the ability to sit in my own thought and even do things on my own. It wasn't that I didn't want to- I just didn't have to.

I decided to take small initiatives for myself like exploring on my own, eating alone, and soon even the 30 min walk to work on my own started to feel nice. I felt that instead of letting my discomfort spiral in my head, I was going to move into that discomfort and try to make something out of it. Because even though it's not the easiest, the idea of personal growth excites me.

Now here I am, sitting on a bench in Cork City eating dinner by myself looking into the sunset, and I find myself feeling this sense of contentment and I thought to myself wow it feels good to be alone. Now I can confidently say I am so excited for what this semester brings and SO happy I decided to take that leap and go abroad again.